What did one penguin say to the other Nothing, penguins don't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Q: What does Chinese look like? A:Chinese

thumb_up thumb_down -23

whats the difference between a ferrari in my garage, and a pile of dead babies in my garage. I do not have a ferrari but i do have a pile of dead babies

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What is the gay guy thinking about? Penis

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What is worse than the holocaust? A worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for his birthday? Twister

thumb_up thumb_down -23

class is canceled. My professor died.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

whats yellow and cant swim? a bulldozer,

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the clock say 10:30? It was a digital clock!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the jew go to the doctors? Because he had a severe headache.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "No, thats only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

So I was banging this French chick the other day and I couldn't understand what she was saying Turns out I raped her.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What happens if you don't use a condom? The person you are sleeping with may get pregnant or contract some kind of STI or STD. In worse cases you or your partner may contract HIV or possibly AID's.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

An old man walks into a bar. It was, a metal cylinder, not unlike a short carbon rod, and not the drinking establishment he normally frequents, named O'Malley's Pub and Eatery, which was, in fact, next to the the building with the protruding metal bar. He suffered greater injury than a younger man due to his advanced age and deteriorating health. But he did eventually recover by strictly adhering to his doctor's advice of bed rest, improved diet, and increased, yet moderate, aerobic exercise.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

I man sees a shooting star and makes a wish. Nothing happens as shooting stars are incapable of granting wishes.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Women. One of the genders a human can be.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Where would you find a dog with one leg? Possibly in a vet's surgery, or in an animal rescue home or being cared for by a loving owner.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

the only thing funny about this website is the fact ciaran hawkins is in love with it

thumb_up thumb_down -23

one time, a fancy business man walked into a bar. but then he figured out that he wasnt supposed to be there. so he politely apologized to the mortician an and he granted him permission to exit the closet.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

60+8.99999999=68.99999999 soo close

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Whats green and smells like bacon................. Green bacon

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why does Beyonc'e sing ''to the left to the left''? Because black women have no rights.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

An irishman walks into a bar and stays there until he goes home.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

why didn't the bully beat up the nerds? His mom got arrested for molestation and his dad got sent to Afganistan so he was too depressed to beat them up.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops