"Hey hey hey, did you hear the joke about the guy with terminal cancer?" "No." "Sorry to break it to you then."

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Why was the boy in the hospital? He was visiting his grandmother, she had cancer and the doctor gave her 3 months to live.

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What's big and green and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A snooker table

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Q: What's worse than ten dead babies nailed to one tree? A: One baby nailed to ten trees.

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Why did Billy Bob kidnap Jamal? Because he finds the African American community fascinating and is unable to start up a regular conversation due to the over-amplified stereotype that rednecks usually kidnap and/or kill black people. Therefore, kidnapping Jamal was necessary so that he could have a conversation with him about his heritage and background.

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What did the cannibal order at McDonalds? Big Mac, extra pickle, hold the mayo.

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasnt that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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wh@t d0 y0u c@II @ d0g5sh£t w1th n0 sm£II? 0ID d0gsh£T

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Whats so bad about all the black people in the world dying? The police would be out of a job.

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So a mouse walks into a bar....the bartender immediatly kills it because he doesn't want another C rating by the sanitation department.

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what did the left eye say to the right eye? "eye" see you

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what did the postman say to the dog, nothing he doesnt speak dog....... but his mother in law does.

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A gorilla walks into a bar and order a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is a little peculiar and then becomes aware he is actually dreaming. He wakes up from his dream and begins to tell his wife about the ridiculous dream he had. His wife just ignores him, the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes his marriage is in shambles.

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What did the bartender say to the fat guy? Hi

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Roses are red Violets are actually purple You should probably see an eye doctor.

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What's the best way to suprise your friend? Shove a banana up his ass.

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Why did this website get run into the dirt? Because you they let idiots like me post whatever I want. _CamelJocky

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Why don't vampires like garlic? Every vampires was raped by a garlic salesman.

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What do you do when you're surrounded by 15 vampires and 15 werewolves? Stop pretending.

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Im a Tree... BARK BARK!!!

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i like going to public parks and watching the kids run and yell because they dont know im using blanks

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whats worse than breaking your arm? getting raped by a squirel

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You want to hear a joke. Sure. A black president. Oh wait...

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What did the orphan get for his birthday? Shit on.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops