Knock Knock! Who Is it? You, Tig

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A man sees Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles and tells his friends about the incident. They believe the story, because it is entirely plausible that it actually happened.

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Knock knock Who's there? Prosti Prosti who? Prostitute

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What do you get when you mix hydrochloric acid and a humans digestive track? Death.

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KONY 2012

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Why did the little girl drop her ball? Because she was done playing with it.

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Me and my family won courtside tickets to the World Finals basketball game! ...WNBA...

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A bear walks into a bar, and says "I'd like a gin... and tonic." The bartender says "AAAAHHH! A BEAR!!!" and calls animal control. Later after the beast has been tranquilized and carted away, he rationalizes having heard the bear speak as trauma-induced hallucination.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are trapped on a deserted island when they come across a magic lamp. The brunette rubs the lamp and a genie appears! The genie offers them each a wish. They all make their wishes, but none of them come true as the genie was simply a hallucination brought on by severe trauma and dehydration.

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And so the Lord said unto John "Come forth and receive eternal life," but John came fifth, and won a toaster instead.

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What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry made it out of the chambers...

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What is funnier than an anti-joke? My SAT scores.

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Whats the difference between cats and dogs? ....cats suck

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Why don't Batman go to an Ozzy Osbourne concert? Because Batman doesn't exist.

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam.

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whats the difference between a dead dog and a dead black guy on the road? there is skid marks leading up to the dog.

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how did the doctors try to cure stephen hawking? turn him off then back on again

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why did the black boy start crying when he was taking a dump? He thought he was melting

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Q - What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and a trampoline? A - I take my shoes off when I jump on a trampoline.

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What is a slave fighting in a pit of Rome? Just a slave. Who cares?

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What's the deal with airline food? Nothin. It's quite scrumcious.

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Why was the girl sad? Because borat came had DA SEXI TIME with yo mother in law:)

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What do you call a black mailman? By his name.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have a fetish for sniffing your shoes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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