Your Mom was so fat he made herself Liposuction Twice

There is a Mexican, American, and an Italian on a boat.They start to sink. All of them brought things from their country. The Mexican threw burritos over and said, "We have too much of these." The American threw american cheese over and said, "We have too much of these in our country." The Italian throws over pizza and says the same thing. They are still sinking. Then, the American picks up the Mexican, throws him over and says, "We have too much of these in our country."

Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

Did you hear about the Dislexic Devil worshipers? They sold their soul to Santa.

Why was the black man crying? His wife left him, took his children, and most of his possessions in the divorce.

what is the difference between lizzy and a momma hippo........ lizzy doesnt bathe.

Two gay men are seen walking down a street in Texas. Actually now that I think about it homosexuality is pretty much outlawed in Texas. Two gay men are thrown into a Texan Jail where they spend the rest of their lives, cold hungry and alone.

What is worse than the holocaust paying taxes

Whats blue, green and red, and runs trough the strees each sunday? ...What? I have no idea, I was hoping you did.

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I don't know. It depends how high the light is.

Why do rabbits have such a reputation for rampant reproduction? Sex feels extra good for rabbits.

You are so ugly that when you were born the doctor didn't say anything to your mother because he has social manners.

How do you kill Chuck Norris? Shoot him in the face.

What worse than being shot? Waking up and finding a penis in your mouth.

If Apple made a house, would it have Windows?

What did the prostitute get for Christmas Money

Q. What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A.One's a scum-sucking bottom feeder, and the other's a human.

Ryan O'Sullivan likes to suck his own penis. - Ryan O'Sullivan.

Q. What did the man say when he beat his video game? A. "I beat my video game." Q. What did the man say after his favorite sports team missed the playoffs? A. "My favorite sports team missed the playoffs." Q. What did the man say when a murderer was in his house? A. Nothing. He was dead.

whats the difference between a pizza and a jew? Pizza is not human, Jewish people are.

what happen to the popo who got arrested? he told himself that he had the right to remain silent

Q. How many men did it take to build a wall? A. None, the wall is already built.

Turnabout: American study of the Japanese Stereotype man: Murican: Excuse me Mr Japanese. Jap: The answer is within the heart of battle.. Murican: Yes but I just want to ask you some few questions. Jap: You are disturbing my feng shui I must power of the mystical fireball of surge fist energy get... *uppercuts waterfall BECAUSE REASONS!* Murican: What? But this is a serious study! Jap: Sowwy I do nothe speeky the shamefull language of the engrish! Murican: But you just said... Sigh... Conclusion: Carpet bombing of Japan funding increased. "slap a Jap" commercial project from world war two reinstated for the safety of the American people. Experiment two: The study of a American man raised in Japan. Murican: Hello I wonder if... American raised in japan: GADOUKEN GADOUKEN GADOUKEN! ORA ORA! Murican: Dead/KO. American/Japan: FRAWRESS VICTOLY! Result: World war 3 GET!

How many black people does it take to change a light bulb? one, its a fairly easy task

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...