What did the cat say to the rabbit? Nothing, cats are incapable of human speech as far as scientists are concerned. Also, the mouse was having a bad day. Rutabaga.

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What do you do when you see a black man with half a head? Stop laughing and reload

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A frog walked into a bar. Except by frog I meant Frenchman, and by bar I meant English pub. The Englishmen in the bar kill the Frenchman in a display of territoriality.

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A- a tv

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Hey you know what? What? Never mind.

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Why did the cop hate black people? He was a racist.

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A man goes to a gas station to pump gas in his car. After about 7 minutes, he leaves.

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what happens if you toss a grey stone into a red sea? it gets wet...

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What did the man who brutally raped and murdered his infant daughter say? He didn't.

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A: What's that on your shoulder? B: A birthmark. A: How long have you had it? B: Don't know.

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Why couldnt jim jump rope? His feet were nailed to the ground.

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What do you get when you cross a dog and a school bus? A dog and a school bus are not sexually compatible and therefore they cannot reproduce.

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Whats included in over 90% of all car crashes? A Car

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walk into your friend’s house and say “what’s up with the dead guy out front?” (you have to murder a person for this joke to work)

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How many dead babies can fit in the trunk of my car? Seven.

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your mums so fat! "last time i heard that i fell of my dinosaur!!" Oh man are you ok?

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Why did the guy lie down? He was dead.

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Isn't everyday "black tie optional"?

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A lion walks in to a bar, and murders everyone inside. This is why animals are not aloud in bars.

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hey did you hear about Osama bin laden? He was found by the CIA and killed on account of his atrocious actions.

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So Nero, do we tell people your comments are all containing codes and stuff so we can stay in touch?

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What do you call a white guy with 5 black guys. The owner of a basketball team

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why did jim die? he had cancer why did jim have no hair? it started to fall out when he was 20 and now he is bald at 30 years old

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Two men walked into a bar. I'm surprised the second man did not duck out of the way.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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