If you work at Penn State you might want to skip the annual "bring your kid to work day"

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What has eight wheels and cost more than a Lamborghini? Two Lamborghinis.

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What's the most popular fruit in the U.S.? Bananas What's the most popular vegetable in the U.S.? Stephen Hawking

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Harold Camping and the May 21st 2011 rapture.....

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What dod the boy with no arms get or christmas? Nothing he can't open them!

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What do you call a blind person? Mack Despard

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what did the man say to the sad woman? go make ma a sammich before i hit you again! the women refused and was hit again.

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A man walked into a bar. He stayed for a bit and had a good time.

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What do you call a bunch of Mexicans running down a hill jail brake

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Dear Diary, I am down to my last drops of water, I'm going to die soon. Wait, a man is offering me some water! Theres still hope, wait he said sike and ran off. I'm going to die alone.

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What's worse than a tree getting cut down? This joke.

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raising eyebrows to expose eyes can also be a signal of attraction ('I'm looking at you, gorgeous. Can you see?').

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Why do elephants paint there feet yellow? so they can hide in mustard bottles. Have you ever seen an elephant in a mustard bottle? exactly

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What's the difference between an eight year old girl and a Jew? Only one comes back from camp.

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A train poops its pants.

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An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Mexican and an American are on a plane. It crashes due to an oversight concerning its weight limit, killing all of its passengers.

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What worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an apple and finding 2 worms

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Who can walk on water? Not the guy in the wheelchair.

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Q.Whats the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? A. I don't were my cleats on my trampoline.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9. Why was 7 afraid of 9? Because 9 was black.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

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A black guy, Jewish guy, Chinese guy and a normal guy walk into a bar. They were all normal but the race of the last guy could not be easily determined.

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Remember how I made you hypnotically cum by poking your own nose last time? When I told you that hypnotic story about the astrologer and the brain surgeon? So you wet yet? Think about how easy its going to be for me when I take out Mr.Big and slap down your coffee table with it, yeah... Feels cozy down there does it not?

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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