Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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What do you think 3 black men want when the come and knock on your car window? They just want directions.

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A guy walks into a bar and says "ouch!" The bartender says "are you okay?" "Yeah I just stubbed my toe" Then the guy walks it off, and then orders a drink.

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What did Osama Bin Laden say to his barber? ????? ??? ?????? ??? ?????, which, in their native language means, I would like to get a haircut.

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Yo mama so fat she at the rest of this joke.

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Why don't seagulls fly over the bay? They do. In fact, seagulls can be found near almost any body of water.

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why did the girl like dick? Because Dick was a nice boy.

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q

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Q: How many Jews can fit in a car? A: 5 in a standard mid sized sedan, or 7 in an SUV

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A construction worker walks into a bar. He says "Ow! That hurt!" And walked in the opposite direction to the manager to complaint about the obvious health code violations of this site.

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What did the Homeless man get for Christmas? A dollar

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A Mexican, German, and a black man walk into a bar... They promptly exit due to the access amount of tobacco fumes in the air.

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what do you do when mrs curaba gets heated through a fridge at her so she can cool down

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Why do women wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

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What is green and fuzzy and can kill you when it falls out of a tree A pooltable

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what would you get if you combined a sixth grader with a machine gun? A homophobe

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I'm on the seafood diet. I eat clams and shrimp because it is healthy for me.

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Once upon a time there was a boy who got ran over by a truck. No one cared.

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My friend thought that an onion was the only food that could make you cry, so I threw a watermelon at his face.

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Knock Knock Who's there? no one, you've got Psycosis

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A white, black, jewish, and hispanic person apply for a job as an accountant who gets the job? One of them.

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Why couldn't a little kid turn around in a hall? He has a spear in his back.

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Q: Why was the boy so sad? A: His parents were just killed in a car wreck, therefore orphaning him and his five brothers and sisters and leaving them with no money, food, or shelter due to lack of steady income and the fact that their house had been foreclosed on.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? ... So he didn't get Mono from Janelle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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