roses are red , thankyou for stating that , i can now continue with gardening as it is my profession.

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Yo momma so fat, the last time she saw 90210 was on the scale!

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What's funnier than diarrhoea? Cancer What's funnier than cancer? The holocaust

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? I raped your mom and she swallowed my load, k

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Q:How many pieces of paper can one tree make? A:Trees cannot make paper, people make paper from trees. So the answer is none, a tree can't make any paper whatsoever.

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Now I have been typing without even thinking about that, and you have been following me.

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What did Stephen Hawking say to the prostitute? A several garbled and mostly inaudible comment that she could not understand.

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A:how many notzies dose it change a light bulb B:none they made the jewish do it. :(

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What is the difference between a urologist and a can of chili? One is hot and spicy, and the other analyzes urine.

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Why did the clock say 10:30? It was a digital clock!

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why did the man break his arm? he didn't, someone else broke it for him

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What did one penguin say to the other Nothing, penguins don't talk.

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whats hard long and has cum in it cucumber

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What happens if you don't use a condom? The person you are sleeping with may get pregnant or contract some kind of STI or STD. In worse cases you or your partner may contract HIV or possibly AID's.

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How can you treble the value of any Skoda car? Ensure its paintwork, upholstary, floor, lights, wipers, steering wheel, brake, horn, CD player, radio and clutch are clean and/or sound; fill its petrol tank, oil, brake and winscreen wiper fluid reserves; fit a roof rack; include a red triangle, a fire extinguisher, a blanket and a first aid kit in the sale; take out comprehensive insurance and pay a year's road tax and MOT before selling it.

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Person 1: *sneeze Person 2: bless you Person 1: I'm jewish. They never spoke again.

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shut up elliot

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Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

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what did the radish say to the orange i'm a radish

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Why did the Muslim boy crash a plane into a building? Because the remote-controlled plane suddenly malfuctioned and crashed into a nearby apartment complex.

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Laugh.

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Whats black and is on sale in shops? Blackberries.

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knock knock whose there? i don't know...

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WHAT DO U CALL GINGERS GABRIELLA

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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