Knock Knock. Who's there? Dementia.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the boy loose his hat Because he got hit by a plane

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did Bert go to the doctor? He had an appointment.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A bloke walks into a bar. He doesn't say 'ouch' because it was a public house and not a hard surfaced object as you may have thought initially

thumb_up thumb_down +29

(waving left hand) Why doesn't Queen Elizabeth wave with this hand? Why? Because this is my hand.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

My grandmother's zodiac sign was cancer, and she was killed by a giant crab.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A horse walks into a bar, and a man says "Hey, why the long face?" The horse calmly turns to him and replies, "Because I'm a horse you drunk moron."

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the murder walk up to the lady in the car? It was his mom.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

If youre African, why are you white?

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A man jumped off a 30 story building. What did he learn? Nothing. He died instatly when he hit the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Q. What's the difference between a Mcdonalds employee and a gynecologist? A. They have different jobs.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

why was the boy sad because he had a cat stapled to his face

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Roses are red violets are blue, he is for me and not for you, he's too ugly you can have him

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Mel Gibson and a Jew walk into a bar They proceed to have a pleasant conversation and both take taxis home

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

So there is a blind man... and he walks past a fish market and takes a deep breath and says"Oh boy it sure does smell like fish out here".

thumb_up thumb_down +27

knock knock who's there... you you who who the fuck are you

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Q-What was Hitlers favorite hobby to proceed in when he was sad? A- Manipulating populations and raping,torturing and mutilating the Jewish population.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A guy walks into a bar, has a few drinks with his mates and gets highly intoxicated.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A blind man, a black man and a rabbi walk into a bar. The blind man trips violently.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

So a guy walks into a bar. It hurt really bad. He was pissed, so he went home and took his seal to a club.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

whdid the cop say to the robber as he ran out of the bakery? I caught you bread handed

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer procrastinated fixing the latch on the coop. Did his wife warn him this would happen? Yessss! Did he listen? Noooo!

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops