There are no stupid Questions just stupid people

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Where did Tommy go after the bomb went off? Everywhere

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kkkk

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What are we ? Students ! What do we want ? Six months holiday ! When do we want it ? Twice a year !

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Did you hear about the 4'10" psychic that escaped from prison? It's on the news! "Small Medium At Large."

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Tom: Hey Fred. Do you wanna hear a joke? Fred: Sure Tom! (long pause) (10 Minutes Later) Fred: Tom, I thought you were gonna tell me a joke? Tom: I did, the joke is that there is no joke.

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"Knock knock." "No."

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why was the giraffes head so far away from his body? because he has a long neck

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What did the virulent Homophobe do during the PRIDE national day of silence? He talked.

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What is more annoying then finding a worm in your apple you

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Why did Emily fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Emily.

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why did the koala fall out of the tree? because it was dead

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So Nero, do we tell people your comments are all containing codes and stuff so we can stay in touch?

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An asian, mexican, and a black guy walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "get the hell out"

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Why do alcoholics use brown bags? Because they are ashamed of what they have become and seek to repress their guilt by entering into denial.

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One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

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So two cannibals are eating a clown. Cannibal one: Does this taste funny to you? Cannibal two: Considering that this man was a clown he must have been in poverty so he resulted to being an alcoholic and maybe over dosed on over the counter drugs. Cannibal one: Thank you for that reasonable answer.

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Two black guys walk into a bar. The bartender says "what are you doing here" and the black guys say "to get a drink"....

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Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

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Why is 6 scared of 7? Because 7 is right behind 7 and he's naked.

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What's the difference between hot tea and cold tea? The temperature.

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What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

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We start counting at 1, therefore 0 is countless. I've slept with countless women.

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You read this in school as the kid sitting next to you stares at his computer screen.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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