Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven's bigger.

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What did the one battery say to the other? Nothing. Batteries can't talk.

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why did the Japanese father cry? because when america bombed japan in wwll it happened to kill the rest of his family

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roses are red violets are blue i suck at rhymming you have nice boobs

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What happened when Mary threw a kettle at Daniel? Daniel was scalded in the facial area and was blinded forever.

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Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness

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Why did Timmy fall down the stairs Because he is blind and I pushed him

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how did the fat man survive the plane crash? he didn't, he died like everyone else.

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3 Blondes walk into a bar. One ducks, the other two are hospitalized with mild concussions

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your mother.

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hear hear

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Legal Mexicans in Texas

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A man violently rapes a small child. Unfortunately the child has aids and gives them to the man.

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Q)What is the best way to get the bitches? A) You shouldn't try. You could go to prison on bestiality charges.

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Whats the best part about having sex with 25 year olds? There 20 of them.

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So, this cheerio is in love with a beautiful frosted cheerio. He asks her on a date. She says no, because she only dates other frosted cheerios. So the cheerio works really hard at his job and is promoted to a honey-nut cheerio. So he asks her out again. She says no because she only dates frosted cheerios. So he works even harder and is made a frosted cheerio. He asks her out again and she accepts. 4 months later after a relationship built on trust and understanding they are married and live a long and fullfilling life together.

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A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

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Your wife died during the delivery.

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What does a chocolate bar and a dolphin have in common? Nothing

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Why was Cinderella so bad at ball? Isn't that sexist, making assumptions about Cinderella's sports capability when you have never seen her play sports before (because she is a fictional character) and then asking why this is true when you have no proof that it is in fact true? But I would guess the correct answer is (if she is bad at ball in the first place) that she never played ball before. Think about it. Why did you have to ask this question at all? Isn't it obvious?

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You're American when you enter the the bathroom and you're American when you exit the bathroom. What are you while you're inside the bathroom? Using the bathroom.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see monkey do. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the second monkey.

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What do you call a Black Man in the ocean? A scuba diver

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Q: What's purple and flies? A: Super Grape

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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