Who gave Miley Cyrus her new haircut? Hellen Keller

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what do a heater and a dead baby have in common? a dead baby is only warm for a small period of time

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Q: What do you call a gay man in a... A: Keith.

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What do you call a dead baby in a lunchbox? It doesn't matter he won't hear you.

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A little boy was taken away in a black van with the promises of candy and a puppy of his very own. What he received? That fore mentioned, and more. The more? Ass rape

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Q : How many babies do you need to paint a wall A : It depends on how hard you throw

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How do you make a plumer sad? You kill his children.

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Why was the black family eating KFC? Because KFC tastes very nice and there was a discount on the family bucket.

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How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? None, for the task at hand is so simple, you should do it.

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

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How do you get down from a horse?? You don't... You get down from a duck.

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yo mama is so ugly she walked by a mirror and looked at her reflection cuz thats what mirrors do

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Why did Elliot Spitzer cross the road? To go have sex with a hooker.

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Just got cancer: YOLO!! -sad face-

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"This is the best of all possible anti-jokes," said Pangloss.

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what d you call three arabs walking through the desert? dehydrated.

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How do you make a baby understand what you want? You color yourself purple, wear a yellow shirt, and do cart wheels while singing "The wheels on the bus go 'round and 'round!"

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What ended in the year 1970? 1969

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Two drums and a sybol fall off the edge of a cliff. They hit a random pedestrian at the bottom killing him instantly. da-dum ch

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, Bushes are red, Oh shit, my garden is on fire

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how many licks does it take to get too the tootsie center of a tootsie pop. Well it depends on how you eat it, there is always the option of biting it, so there is no defined answer, as well as ones lick might absorb more of the lollipop then another mans.

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Why did the women sleep in the kitchen. Due to the poverty levels of her area of residence, sub-sahara Africa, she, her 7 children and 3 orphaned nephews lived in one ram shackled room with a corrugated iron roof which served as a multi-purpose kitchen, bedroom, lounge and greeting area.

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Why doesn't little jimmy ride his favourite bike to school any more? He was playing on the platform at at the railway station, tripped and fell across the track, at which point a seven carriage train came through at over 150 mph and cut through his upper thighs crushing everything in his legs and causing them to fall off.

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An astronaut, a nun and a fireman walk into a bar. They all order something to drink as they have all had a busy day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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