Why scooby-doo likes cookies? Because he's chub!

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Your dad isn't gay...but his boyfriend..HES REALLY GAY!

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a duck walks onto a basketball court during a game. The referee sees the bird and blows his whistle crying fowl just as the player was running up to dunk. The confused bird flies away and the referee gets punched by the angry player.

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what does a baby sound like in a microwave. i don't know i was masturbating

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Q: Why did Jimmy not have balls? A: A terrible, terrible sand paper accident.

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Why did the little boy fall down the tree? He didn't. He jumped.

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how many tentacles did the mentally retarded octopus have? answer: 8!

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Why are kids with Aspergers Syndrome always banned from Mcdonalds? Let me repeat that: Ass Burgers.

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Roses are red My name is Dave This poem makes no sense Microwave

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Why was the man hit by the car? Hellen Keller was driving.

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Chuck norris is seen standing outside a bakery in Paris holding numchucks. He just finished lunch

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Knock knock Whos there? A rapist. Go away I'm calling the police!! (The rapist then proceeds to break open the door, beat the woman repeatedly with a baseball bat, and then rapes her)

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there's a blonde and a brunette jumping out of a plane, what one hits the ground first? they both hit at the same time because gravity pulls everything down towards the earth at the same pace

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American: Nice cowboy hat Australian: hahahahahaha American: What's so funny? Australian: You're so incompetent... American: What does incompetent mean? Australian: http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/7/78/Trollface.svg/200px-Trollface.svg.png

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Why was the 13 year old drug addict crying? Because somebody shot him in the foot

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One day, a small bald man was walking up the street, when her saw a large red porche, extremely grand, and the door was wide open. He walked over and inspected the open door, and to his surprise, the keys were in place by the steering wheel. He was a good man, with a loving wife and two teenage children, and he had no intention of steeling the vehicle. But astonished by the owner lack of protection, he hopped into the car and drove it around the block, just for the thrill of riding such an amazing car. Around 30 seconds after, he parked the car, got out, leaving the car in the same place, with the door open and the keys in, then he walked home and lived the rest of his life.

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Why did you loose the basketball game? Because they scored more points than us.

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What's worse than finding out that your dog has worms? Finding out that you have worms.

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What did the guy say when he came out of the closet? Where's my green shirt?

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Who is best known for causing the Mt. St. Helens Eruption, The World Series Earthquake, and The Asian Tsunami in 2004? According to insurance companies, God.

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What did one hand say to the other? Nothing, you fool, hands don't talk.

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Why is the Mexican a gardener? He has a mental disability that makes him unable to do more than a simple task.

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Q: whats the difference between 3 asain people 3 black people and 3 mexican prople?? A: there all different nationality

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Roses are red.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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