What did the black man say to the other black man? We are both black men.

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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How do you make a baby crawl in circles? Nail its hand to the ground

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A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

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Why did Biggie Smalls eat so much dark chocolate? His doctor suggest that he eat foods high in fiber.

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Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs, living in the mountains? A: Cliff Q: What do you call a girl with no arms and no legs, living on the beach? A: Sandy Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs hanging on a wall? A: A victim of a serious crime, where murder was committed and the killer has a sick and twisted mind because he first cut off the man's arms and legs then nailed him to the wall with wooden pegs. Puppies.

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Why did the asian lady buy the large shirt instead of the medium? Because the medium didn't fit

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What do you call it when a cigarette is brown instead of white? A cigarette that is or has been damp so that the nicotine was able to bleed into the paper and dye it.

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Laugh

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Why wouldn't Michael J. Fox make a good Sniper? Because he has no military experience.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A lot of things, because a dead baby isn't funny at all.

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Roses are Black, Violets are Black, I am Ray Charles

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, a car ran him over.

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What's 9 + 10 19

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Q: what do you call a camel with a garbage bag on its head? A: A ziploc baggie

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Why couldn't the little boy tie his shoes? He had no arms

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Knock knock Who's there Ted Bundy

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What does a person with Alzheimer's do? To get to the other side.

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Hey I'm a poet and I didn't even realize that I was a poet

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Why did the man die a slow and painful death? Because he kept submitting stupid, recycled anti-jokes over and over; so, I killed him.

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What do you call it when a dead man has his wallet stolen? Rob Zombie.

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sometimes i put my hands on the floor tuck my head into my cheat and lean forward... because thats how i roll

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What did the sheep say to the Commonwealth Committee on September 11 2001? Baabaaabaaaahhh

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MAKE TEA NOT WAR!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops