19 cats 33 hamsters 24 turtles and 23 dogs are all in a small cage, PETA is not happy.

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Q. What did the Muffins say to the man? A. Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects therefore unable to speak.

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When life gives you lemons, go sell them for crack.

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When life gives you lemons you have lemons.

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What's cool about a dead fish? Nothing.

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A white man walks into a bar. He stabs 4 people and 1 escapes with extremem blood hemorages. his fanily later finds him bleeding on their family car. They take him to the hospital where he is put on life support. Later that night they are told there is nothing the doctors can do and the man slips away in his sleep. Who is to blame? The black guy in prison.

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When the mom came home from work, she was very tired. Her son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She says sure and makes one for him. The boy was very happy and ate his sandwich. I was actually lying above. The mom was actually killed by three men in hoodies that were hiding in her backyard. The came inside and also murdered the boy. Worst of all the killers took all of the food and the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat, Guess it doesn't matter since he is gone...

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Why did the boy let go of his red ballon? Because he was hit by a car

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How did the weak old man with cancer beat it? He hung himself.

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Want to hear something funny? Sure, what? 9/11

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knock knock whos there? IRS Oh....

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whats worse than finding a worm in your penis having your wife bite of your penis and die from an infecction

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A man walk to the store and buys some clothes.

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whats the diffrence between a lawnmower and a sack of dead babies? I dont have a lawnmower in my garage

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How do you prank a blind man? Uou leave the plunger in the toilet.

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When the loaf of bread crashed the car the wife was mad. What do you think she did? She put Nutella on him toasted him and then ate him

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Who let the dogs out? Their owner because he had come to the rational conclusion that they were cooped up in their cage all night and were in serious need of relieving themselves and needed love and affection

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Why was 6 afraid of 7.... because 7 was black

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff, Whats not pink and fluffy? Sexual assault.

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How do you know when you've ritten too many anti-jokes? When you answer your own question as a rhetorical device

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why did john wear a red hat? because blue is his favorite color

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What did the Canadian Goose say to the Snow Goose? You're white.

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What's the difference between Justin Beiber and a horrible singer? Nothing.

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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