What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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A White man, a Black man, and an Asian man go to Heaven. They were in a plane crash.

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A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

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Why does it take 7 years for Harry Potter to kill Voldemort? Voldemort is a very powerful wizard and Harry Potter is just learning magic at the beginning so he is not prepared to fight him.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

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A jew, a catholic and a muslim walk into a bar. The catholic man dies of a massive heart attack and the other two men mourn their friend for weeks.

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What happened when the Mexican lays his head on a pillow? He falls asleep

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What is your favorite color???? My mom I got u s o godd.

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Whats the quickest way to get famous? kill the president

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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A man comes into a bar. Wait, it's a horse. A man comes into a horse.

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Why are there so many smiths in the phonebook? Because they all have phones.

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What's worse than getting a parking ticket? Getting brutally raped in the anus by the Dark Lord Satan.

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What do you call a Mexican that crossed the border. An Illegal Immigrant.

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Why can't Hellen Keller play the piano? She's dead.

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Whats worse then sneezing on someone? sneeze on someone and find out

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven eight nine

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hickory dickory dock no one cares

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What's black and white and read all over? Half a zebra.

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What did the duck say when it saw a puddle? Nothing.Ducks are uncapable of speaking human speech.

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What's hairy and sags? A ball sack

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Cancer.

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What happened when the woman sent back the pair of shoes she bought on eBay? She obtained a refund from the seller under eBay's return policy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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