If you're head weren't attached to your shoulders... you'd be dead.

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There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

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What is black and hanging from the tree in my back yard? A tire Swing.

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Why cant the guy drink his beer Because he hasnt opened it yet

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What happenend after the chicken tried to cross the road? a KFC opend

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Did you hear about the black kid that had a gun? Yeah, it's a.20 gage that his father bought him for Christmas so that he could go hunting together

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What day is it today? It's "Jack Daniels Day" according to that guy with the shopping cart filled with kittens.

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#IHateHashtags

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Word Problem Q.John has 32 candy bars. He eats twenty eight of them. What does he have now? A. Diabetes. John has Diabetes.

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas? A bike.

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Why aren't elephants allowed in public pools? Because they are elephants.

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So a deaf man is listening to the radio.

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Something other than a Human Being walks into a bar. The bartender then makes a rational decision about how to handle the situation.

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How do you convince a therapist that he is crazy? Hide in a fortress made of sporks wearing nothing but a belt, and start hissing and throwing paint at him repeatedly.

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What can hitler cook well Steak

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When life throws lemons at you, just give up and commit suicide!

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

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Why did the chair break? The person that sat in it was over weight

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What do you get when you take a bag of chips and divide it by 5? a Nike store worker's meal

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The Mexican; the black man had too much alcohol and the Mexican was the designated driver.

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i feel like when the radish was discovered someone was like "hey lets call it rad!" and another guy was like "lets dial it down a bit"

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You are right, the past still has its claws deep within me thank you friend.

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A blond, a brunette, and a redhead all entered their designated classrooms to begin AP testing. They all worked extraordinarily hard to earn a passing grade and receive college credit. The brunette and the redhead received passing, yet average, grades. The blond also received a score that reflected the amount of effort she put into studying and memorizing the material, because there is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke....? A pig rolling in mud!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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