Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither Has He.

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What did George Washington say before he crossed the Delaware? "Get in the boat."

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What's worse than a baby in a trash can The holocaust

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why was six afraid of seven? seven was a sex offender

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Does this smell like chloroform to you?

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What was Steve Jobs' favorite fruit? Grapes.

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Where's the best place to buy moon bars? Michael Toal

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So a guy walks into a bar. It hurt really bad. He was pissed, so he went home and took his seal to a club.

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A woman gets into the front seat of a car and starts driving.

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What did the man say when his wife said hello? Hello.

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What do Michael Jordan and Michael Jackson have in common? The same first name.

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How did the retarded, blind child win the Special Olympics? He didn't, he died of terminal lung cancer the year before. R.I.P.

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

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What do you call a monkey holding a hand grenade? It depends on what its name is.

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This is a little story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody. There was an important job to be done and Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it. Somebody got angry about that because it was Everybody's job. Everybody thought that Anybody could do it, but Nobody realized that Everybody wouldn't do it. It ended up that Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did what Anybody could have done

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Why did Sally have a headache? She had a Brian tumor the size of an eggplant.

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person: Ask me if i'm a tree other person: are you a tree? person: no

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What do you do when you see a black man getting hitted by a Mexican taxi? -Call 911

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I never knew I was dyslexic. Then one day I showed up to a toga party dressed as a goat.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I can't wait to shove my finge in you

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How do you make a French-man cry? Kill his family.

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Why did Susy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? NOT SUSY!

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What did the raped girl get for Christmas? Pregnant.

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A Jew buys something that is not on sale

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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