Knock Knock Who's There? Peyton Peyton who? Peyton Manning

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What did the raped girl say to the doctor? Nothing she was dead on arrival.

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*Knock, Knock* Who's there? George. George who? George Ronald.

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Did you hear the one about the man who fell asleep on the job? He woke up.

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How many cupcakes are there in the world joe How many? I don't know I was asking you.

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Why did the chicken kill himself To get to the other side.

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what do you call cheese that is not yours? stolen property

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Q:What's red and crawls up your leg? A: A homesick abortion

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How do you confuse Helen Keller? You don't, she's dead.

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What is the difference between a dead baby and a mustang? I dont have a mustang in my garage.

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What Did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

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roses are black violets are black I'm blind i need a dog.

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Diana- hey i havnt seen you all summer. Whaaat did you do over the summer? Paul- contract HIV Diana- ...oh ...

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Why are black people good at basketball? While there are many preternaturally gifted black men and women in professional basketball, the notion that one race holds sway over the others in terms of sheer skill and talent is a ridiculous stereotype; propagated, no doubt, by both ignorant and jealous persons of other colors.

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What's the difference in a big brother and a wee brother? Ones big, ones small.

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How do you stop a canadian from saying eh? Kill it...

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LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL

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people can be soooo loud!!!!!!! sooo loud that they wake up helen keller!!!!!!

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the bird.

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Tom: God! Matt:Where? Tom:Matt i was saying God ! Jesus! Matt: God and Jesus! wow! Tom: why am i talking to you? Matt: Wanna play a game? Tom:bye.

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Asian women drivers...

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks why the long face? The horse, unable to comprehend human speech, promptly craps on the floor and leaves.

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What do you get when you take a bag of chips and divide it by 5? a Nike store worker's meal

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your face

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops