hey babe, are you made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium? because i like people made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Where did Suzie go after the explosion? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's big, white, and if it falls out of a tree, it can kill you? A refrigerator.?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? To go to work. And be sexually harassed. For 70 cents on the dollar.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

One day a married couple have a conversation. The husband says, "Make me a sandwich." The wife says, "Okay, what do you want on it?"

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Caramel Boing.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Flowers are colors Love me

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the Wife cheat on her Husband? Because she was a f***ing BITCH.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's worse than dying in a car wreck with your family? You being the only one that dies.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you get when you combine lemons, sugar and water? Lemons, sugar, and water

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Wat do u call a priests shit Holy shit

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the blond say when she got into a car crash? Nothing, she died.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the hammer say to the screwdriver? You're a tool

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Patient: Doctor, do I have cancer? Doctor: Yes. Patient: Will I live? Doctor: No. Patient: So what do I do? Doctor: SUCK IT UP!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did they black straight guy go into an all white gay bar....? Because he went to the wrong place.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

i tell you whats funny......... what? a fat sudanese man

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q: Why did the crazy man stare at the orange juice container? A: Because it started talking.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What will ur wife say when she finds you in bed with a hore-s.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was the little kid bullied? Because kids are goats.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

This is the same thing you told me once, believe me, it helps holding into it.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How do you cure a person that claims cannot say no to anything? Treatment: *locks door* NOW SAY NO TO ME! BUAHAHAHAHA! Patient: NO I CANT!!! You care cured! *opens door* NEXT!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A man walks into a bar. His crippling alcoholism is tearing his family apart.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

s s is for shit h h is for hit i i is for it t t is turtle

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops