your mama so fat she has a low self esteem

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Q: What did the Catholic man say in response to the gay man asking what he likes to do? A: golf

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A Stick!

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Do you know what it looks like when you put a cat in the microwave for 3 minutes? I don't know either because I close my eyes when I masturbate.

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what do you call a redneck virgin? a seven year old that can run faster than her brothers.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven has a hook for one of his hands carries a chain saw in the other an gets into six's dreams...thats just scary

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How do you rescue a fat girl that's stuck under a car? With a pickaxe and a donkey.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I don't know why.

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After pursuing a speeding vehicle for 10km at speeds ranging from 120 - 160km/h, the police officer managed to stop the driver. The driver of the vehicle rolled down the window and asked, "What seems to be the problem officer?" to which the police officer replied, "It sounds like one of your cylinders is firing incorrectly, you have a fairly large amount of carbon build-up on and around your exhaust pipe."

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24

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how do you know if your friend is your best friend? if he cries you cry, if he laughs you laughs, if he jumps out a window you laugh again.

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Why can't helen keller drive? She never got her permit

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Why did the murder walk up to the lady in the car? It was his mom.

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Why did Little Suzie fall off her bike? I hit her with a shovel. Why did little Suzie die? I hit her with a shovel and she fell off her bike.

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What has two wheels and a handle bar? A bike.

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What did the drunk man say to his wife? "I love you, Honey"

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Chuck Norris threw a grendade, killed 50 people, then it exploded This is a highly improbable event considering no man is faster then a grenade

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Yo momma's so skinny she doesn't have any fat!

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Knock knock, Who's there? The police, you have committed 14 major felonies and you are being arrested.

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What did the Mexican say when a house fell on him? Nothing. He's dead.

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what worse the 2 dead kids in a van 3 dead kids in a van

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What's the best way to get high without doing drugs? Jump.

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Why cant jonny walk? He has no legs.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? ....Mrs Murray silently returned to her armchair, a single tear rolling down her weathered cheek. Her lonely existence deepened, as she realised the gang of boys had fooled her again.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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