If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's the difference between difference and between? One is difference the other is between.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why'd the squrille fall out of the Tree? Cause it was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did you get for your birthday? I got older

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Sex education in Texas.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why don't you push a mexican off a bike, because its probably yours,

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why can't Anne Frank write a sequel? Because she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Patient: Doctor Doctor! Every Time I Drink Some Tea, My Eye Is Really Sore! Doctor: Next Time Take The Spoon Out...

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Bannana man do do do do do ect.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A black man, hispanic man, and white man walk in to a bar. They are all friends. They enjoy a few beers together then call a taxi to take them home because it is irresponsible to operate a motor vehicle while under the influence of alcohol or other drugs.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's the hardest part of rollerblading? Telling your dad you're gay.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's more greasy than grease? Kevin's hair

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why doesn't the chicken cross the road Because his dad got ran over by a car when he crossed the road

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's did the white man say to the black man? Howdy.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Nobody likes you ya noob! (-_-) *sniff* MAN YOU SMELL BAD

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A father and son are involved in a car crash. The father is killed, sadly, but the boy is rushed to the hospital. The doctor prepares for surgery, and since this boy has no family-connections to her, she performs successful surgery on him, and the boy goes home after 3-5 days.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Milkman. Milkman who? I've been coming here for 14 years and you don't even know my name? I helped take your mother to the hospital for crying out loud! I held you in my arms as a baby! And you don't even have the decency to remember MY NAME?! I'm sorry I don't live in a house that allows milk and other groceries to be delivered, I'm sorry that I wasn't born into a nice family with a nice home! I'm sorry that I have had to come here EVERY WEEK FOR FOURTEEN YEARS and you can't even remember my NAME! My name! I left my family for christmas one year to go pick up that elmo doll for you when you were a kid! I saved you from that burning treehouse! I helped you with you're 3rd grade science fair project and you won! YOU WON! We took a picture together that i have kept in my wallet. And i proudly say here's me and timmy. ME AND TIMMY! TIMMY! But no...you don't need to know my name. Well good day sir. You shan't see me again.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock knock Who's there? (Punch the listner in the face)

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's black, then white, then dead all over? Michael Jackson

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what do you get if you put in a pan- a raw chicken, a lemon, assorted vegetables, onions, maybe some soy sauce, and a little olive oil then place this pan into an oven for around two hours, allowing the chicken to moisten. then serve with the assorted vegetable .supper.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

spell backwards: taco cat

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a man that paints on a his face and wears big shoes? Lady Gaga.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops