Im gay What about you

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What did the one eyed boy say at the movie theater? 3D was a boy choice

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. The mexican, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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Why the hell does my sister shower in a swimsuit every time? Its not as if anyone is looking! ALRIGHT! ONCE ALRIGHT? ONLY ONCE! But then she hears the sound of my zipper ONCE and the shit hits the fan! Which is weird, yeah suuure she hears it when I pull it up, but when I pull it down and stroke it and moan? Nada!

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There are two muffins in an oven neither can say anything at the moment, however, because both are in excruciating pain.

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Want to hear a joke? Women's rights

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Sorry Liz, his sodium levels are so bad that while he is drinking a lot, his body is not containing water, and while his pulse and breath is fine he is passing out from time to time, he is asking for stimulants Ritalin specifically, but I am not sure if his body could withstand that, I really don't mind to pry, but does he use Ritalin? I mean he chats a lot, but ADHD? I am just asking out of health concerns, not that I am a doctor, but I just worry... Flirty personality... More like a clown, he says he refuses to eat unless I breastfeed him XD. He is eating now though, solids work, never had a tougher patient, he will make it for sure.

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How do you confuse and anger a blonde? Kill her family and loved ones and say you did it because potato.

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Q: Why did the baby cross the road? A: Because it was stapled to the chicken.

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why did the mushroom go to the party? because he`s a fungi

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A man walked into a room and said to his friend, "I am about to show you something amazing." He claps twice and the lights turn on. He is using a device called The Clapper made by Joseph Enterprises, Inc. using advanced technology that was patented in 1985.

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PENIS

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how do you get 20 people in a mini? open the door would be a good start but i dont think they will all fit.

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You are the most beautiful person in the world.

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Me: Hey mom Mom: Hey Son Me: Whats? for dinner? Mom: I dont know

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Justin Beiber

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A black man walks into a bar. "Ouch!" He says as the Klu Klux Klan beat him with sticks

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A man is playing pacman, on his last life, and is cornered. He inserts another coin in the slot.

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Once Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked a guy so hard that he got a large bruise.

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Your mum is so fat, she is likely to do die before my mum.

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Why did the frog cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken.

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Neil Lewis

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What did the little kid say to the stranger? Nothing. He was taught not to talk to strangers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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