Where is one place everyone eventually goes to rest? A cemetery.

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Am I a cat? No, I am a human; cat's cannot type.

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sally has no arms knock knock who's there not sally

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Why cant Michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? because he is dying of parkinson's disease.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because

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Elephants can jump higher than the tallest building. You know why? It's because buildings can't jump.

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if you are reading this your wasting your time

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Why is the sky blue? I don't know I thought you knew

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Why didn't the Hispanic die in the bus explosion? Because he was at home playing with his children when it happened.

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Why did Timmy drop his ice cream cone? Because a skyscraper landed on him. Yes. A skyscraper.

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I once duped this chick with a parrot. Crazy thing wouldn't shut up. The parrot was pretty cool

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Q. what's red and smells like blue paint A. a dead baby in a trash can beside a foster home

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whats long ,hard and full of sea men ? a sumureen

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1657 is a cool number, when a leprachaun sings it sounds like pie drinking an obese penguin (do you know what I mean....) :D

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Your dad is so abusive that he hurts you when he losses his temper

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knock knock. who's there. gestapo.

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What did the hat say to the scarf? Nothing.

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Why did the black man sleep all day? He suffered from narcolepsy.

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A man walks into a bar. He's black. Its 1962. He is immediately arrested.

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What's the difference between your garage and mine? A pile of dead babies.

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A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

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A white straight man, a black gay man, and an Asian bisexual woman walk into a bar. They are enjoying their drinks until one overly intoxicated man makes a remark towards the group in reference to their diversity in race, sexual orientation, and sex. The bar crowd is enthused with the drunk man's genius in not only constructing a joke to cover all three categorical descriptions of the group, but in guessing each member's sexuality based on their respective appearances.

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I used to tell people: step on my foot on purpose and ill FUCKlNG BREAK YOURS! Then I Evolved.. friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: Thumb me down or step on my foot if only on mistake, and I will break off both your legs and ram them up your ASS!

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What kind of cheese isn't yours? Someone else's.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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