Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because blind people aren't allowed to drive in the United States.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How do you keep an idiot busy? Give him something to do.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How do you stop your golf ball from hitting a goose? You dont.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Chrismas? Cancer. What did he get for his birthday? Nothing, he didn't live that long

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

why was the cream sad? he was frozen and turned into a popular dessert

thumb_up thumb_down -11

sally was hit by a bus and lost both arms knock knock who's there? not sally

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 20 years later he would gamble away his life savings and then go onto live a lonely and unfulfilled life.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Yo' momma is so fat, that- Wait. Sorry. Too far?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

There was an Englishman a Welshman and a Scotsman, all of whom were nationals of the United Kingdom.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the chicken invent a memory ereaser machine? So he could erease everyone's memory so they would stop making chicken jokes

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Erron who the hell are you? How many people are you going to use before you finish whatever the fuck is on your agenda?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why cant a black person read? Because there is nothing to read...

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A Chinese man, an Italian man and a French man are sitting in a plane. They arrive in Los Angeles with a 23 minute delay due to atmospheric conditions

thumb_up thumb_down -11

An American, an Indian and an African walked into a bar. They had a memorable time together.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the P.E. coach say to the fat kid? you need to exercise

thumb_up thumb_down -11

I met a fat girl and fucked her on an elevator. . . It was wrong on so many levels.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Knock knock who's there? Boo. Boo who? Uh, Boo Johnson, your next door neighbor. Forget it I'll come another day.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's worse than no christmas? Taking a chainsaw to the face.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Adam Chebali has no life

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the dinosaur cross the road? It didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

what's the difference between dodo and doodoo doodoo is still around for you to see

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why does Eric Clapton use a Mac? Because he prefers Macs.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the octopus say to the squid? Nothing, considering these two species can't speak.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops