whats a mexicans favorite sport? cross counrty

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

a jerk that i knew was in a bar. he was about to drive home. at first i tried to stop him until he was sober. instead he punched me in the face. then i dared him to drive home as fast as possible. he died that night... i texted him all the way...

Why did the car catch fire? It was parked in Ferguson, MO

What's got eight legs and one eye? Two chairs and half a pigs head.

your momma's so ugly that she currently deals with an overwhelmingly self consciousness view of her appearance to the point where she has contemplated suicide and it is in your best interest to seek her medical help in order to preserve her heath and overall well being.

What would you get when you cross a bear and a shark? a highly improbable situation because sharks and bears live completely different environments.

You:Knock knock friend:who's there you:come in friend come on who you:come in your mother

your moma is sao fat that she is gay . nope im sorry thats just mean.

What's five miles long and has an IQ of 40? A democrat parade.

What do you get when you put Star Wars and Disney together? A Bad Sequel

2001, 2 airplains fly into the world trait centers. the pilots then had their licences taken away.

What did jonah say to your mum ... Nothing jonah is your mum

You know you're drunk when you've spend a significant amount of time consuming alcohol.

How do you keep an idiot busy? Give him something to do.

How do you stop your golf ball from hitting a goose? You dont.

There was an Englishman a Welshman and a Scotsman, all of whom were nationals of the United Kingdom.

A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 20 years later he would gamble away his life savings and then go onto live a lonely and unfulfilled life.

Yo' momma is so fat, that- Wait. Sorry. Too far?

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because blind people aren't allowed to drive in the United States.

why was the cream sad? he was frozen and turned into a popular dessert

One day, a small bald man was walking up the street, when her saw a large red porche, extremely grand, and the door was wide open. He walked over and inspected the open door, and to his surprise, the keys were in place by the steering wheel. He was a good man, with a loving wife and two teenage children, and he had no intention of steeling the vehicle. But astonished by the owner lack of protection, he hopped into the car and drove it around the block, just for the thrill of riding such an amazing car. Around 30 seconds after, he parked the car, got out, leaving the car in the same place, with the door open and the keys in, then he walked home and lived the rest of his life.

How do you make a tissue dance? You really can't, but you could grab it and shake it around so it looks like its dancing.

what do you call a middle-aged man with one blue suede shoe on, purple hair, pink skin, white eyes, no toenails, 67 fingers, 1 eye, a pocket watch, no clothes, and 8978967564567898765432345678765321234568909876543w245678909876543456098765323456-0987654367890-098765435678-09876543456789098765432345678909876543456789098765435678909876543234567898765323456890-987654345678900987654323456890987653234567890765434568909876543456899876543456789098765434568909876545678987654345678987654567898765434567898765478579458765456789876543223456789876543098765432123456898765432678987654230987653-098765434567898765434898765434567898765456787654567876 butt cheeks? bob.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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