Wanna know what is gross? a dead baby in a dumpster. Grosser? Ten dead babies in a dumpster. Grosser? There is a live one at the bottom. Grosser? It ate its way out. Grosser? It came back for seconds.

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Why did the kid need glasses? A monkey threw a fridge at him.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there happened to be road in the vicinity of the fowl and the odds of the bird crossing it is very high.

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whats hard long and has cum in it cucumber

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Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

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How did Clumsy Clearance eat shit? He was in the Human Centipede.

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What's plastic and kids turn it on... A xbox.

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What color do you get when you mix aquamarine with magenta? Transvestite.

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What's brown and smells like shit? The rapidly decaying bodies of several dead chipmunks.

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whats black and blue and white all over A little caucasian boy who is being abused by his parents

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What did the cat say to the dog? Meow

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How do you know a black person is in your house? You see him in your house.

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a chicken walks into a bar and gets drunk. the locals then proceed to tell the police because the chicken was harrassing people after he got drunk

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: You were adopted.

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what is brown and sticky? a stick.

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Why did the submarine crash? Someone opened the window

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If chuck noris has five dollars and you have five dollars, he has more money than you. He forgot about the extra dollar in his back pocket

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Guy One: Guess what? Guy Two: What? Guy One: I don't know, that's why I asked you.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You smell like ass, And no one loves you!

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Q: what do you get when you mix a bull dog and a shiitzu? A: a dog

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'Why the long face?' The horse replies 'I've got AIDS.'

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So a man walks into a bar and he says "Can i have two beers?" The bartender says "Sure, Budweiser or Heineken?" The man responds "Uhmm... which one do you prefer?" The bartender says "Heineken."

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's house? Neither has he.

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What if your name was Mr. David and the office called you down and you were wearing a dress?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops