what did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? we are both lawyers

How come grilled cheese?

why did the black person cross the road to get to his lynched sister

Q: Where do zombies shop? A: Zombercrombie.

Why wasn't the black kid allowed in the school? Because it was the Southern United States in the 1930s and due to racial tensions at the time most public facilities were seperated by race.

roses are red violets are blue i killed your family

What will ur wife say when she finds you in bed with a hore-s.

Why don't elephants smoke? Because they would be afraid of the fire, and they are much more adversely affected by recreational drugs than humans are.

How do you keep kids off your lawn? You molest them.

What did the blonde say when she was asked what color her hair was ? Blonde.

How do you make a Flamingo cry? Hit it with a sledgehammer.

Why did the asian man go to the bar with a black man? Because they both wanted to enjoy a few beers in the company of another.

Q:What do you call an insecure person A:Somebody who is likely to commit suicide

What word is 7 letters long, is composed of the letters N,G,G,E,R, and S, and stands for a group of people who annoy the crap out of you? NAGGERS.

A depressed man walks into a bar. He has a drink and heads back to his apartment. On the way he was killed by another man attempting to commit suicide due to depression.

Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

What do you call someone who's sad? A depressed person

Screw it you write the joke.

Q: Why did the white man die? A: because he had cancer

It's porn, we all knew that, do you have something interesting to say?

What do you do i a stranger offers you candy? Make sure its not stale then jump in his van.

How can you tell two twin sisters apart? Look at one twin, then look at the other, and acknowledge that they are two different people.

A black man is setting up contingency measures of protection in his personal place of residence when all of a sudden, several warning alarms sound and a few specialized people with red "combating" devices who were alerted by the blatant scenerio unfolding before them were moving quickly in order to match previously stipulated criteria of value. The black man and his family were partaking in a monthly fire drill unfolding in their own house since they were extremely responsible, law-abiding citizens of the city they were located in that required various kinds ofl saftey precautions to be taken so to mitigate the serious chance that people might be hurt by preventable, residential distasters.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well I'll tell you. He was happily gliding down the sidewalk when he realized that his destination was across the road. He then proceeds to take In his surroundings . He finds that there is no indication telling him to stop so he then cautiously walks across the road watching for any dangerous movement. He safely makes it across and proceeds to his destination which is the slaughtering house. He is a retarded chicken

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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