Boy: Hey girl, the voices in my head tole me to come over and talk to you. Girl: ... *walks away*

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What does a baby and a bowling ball share in common? They both displace a similar amount of water.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Knock, knock. Who's there? Sasquatch. Sasquatch who? ROAR

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A fish walks into a bar. He proceeds to talk the bartender. "Blub blub blub" The fish sitting next to him whispers to the bartender. "What is he talking about." The bartender shrugs.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Which of the following is the reason the Titanic sunk. Select all that apply. A. Iceberg B. No radar C. Late warning D. Put your hands on me Jack E. This ship can't sink F. Over by the bed, the couch G. God himself can't sink this ship Z. All the above X. None of the above Q. Why are you still reading

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: A giraffe fell in a hole and died. Which was taller the Lion or Giraffe? A: The Giraffe was before it died

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the muslim say when he boarded the plane? Where is my seat

thumb_up thumb_down -8

man: why did the chicken cross the road? other man: why ? man: i don't know, ask him your self. other man: ...

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why is it okay to have four cats? Because I said so.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why do white people not eat crackers? Cause it's cannabalism.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: "There goes my income. I dont know how I'll support my family now, or keep my crops alive."

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar? Actually it's my cookie jar, and my cookies. I stole nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting a girl pregnant.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A friend? Just a friend that you told to stop pretending to be me? And you had no idea whatsoever that I am Nero as in not one of the six hundred thousand wabbabes?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why was George Washington buried in Virginia? Because he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's worse than finding a fly in your soup? Being raped... What's worse than being raped? The Holocaust What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding two flies in your soup

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What is black and bad for your teeth? A cannon ball

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Three men are facing a firing squad. They are all promptly executed. Even if they were to escape by distracting the executioners, they would no doubt be shot down before they could get for.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's flaming and has wheels? A firepit. I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

how many toyota's does it take to pee on a soccer game 900 because isis is a cat vagina

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the kid take the trash out to the movies? Because his mum said take out the trash

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Person 1: what is 2 + 2? Person 2: 4 Person 1: no Person 2: what is it than? Person 1: vagina

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why was six afraid of seven? 7 is greater than 6. Didn't you learn about number lines in 3rd grade?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Who does creatine? James Cornish

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops