Why did my toaster break? because it was made in china

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did Daniel Nitz cross the road during rush hour? Because he's an idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What happened when the Asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's black, smoking, and sitting at the top of the stairs? Steven Hawking after a house fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

how did the woman get her baby to stop crying? she hit him with a axe

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Where's the best place to gather black people to roleplay as prison victims for a documentary? Prison or the Graveyard.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Can you smell what the Rock is cooking? Yes, it's delicious!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the carrot jumped over the fence? It didn't. Carrots do not have the physical ability to jump.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what do you call a black man in a police car? either officer or offender, depending on what role he has in the crime.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

we asked cheryl cole what she would do if it was the last day on earth she replied.. id probably spend all the time with my family. wrong cheryl youd spend your last day on earth running away from other people wanting to accomplish their last day on earth dreams

thumb_up thumb_down -4

The opposing forces behind all human beings is not light vs darkness, not good vs evil, but fear vs ' love. Whatever is overwhelmingly good for one person, is evil to many. Overwhelming darkness wont allow you to see. Overwhelming light will make you blind. You can never fear overwhelming love. You can never love overwhelming fear. These are the true polar opposites, part of all emotion that drive the human being.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Were do seamen live under the sea? A submarine!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What does a homeless man get for Valentines Day? Divorce papers

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what does matt daly like to do in his free time anal

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Your mom showed up at my house last night. I kindly greeted her and asked if I could help her with anything.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

An airplane's engine suddenly blows up in the middle of its flight. The pilot turns around and sees a blonde and a brunette. He turns to his right and sees only two parachutes. The pilot says "Ok guys, only two-" Then the plane blows up.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

No pen- no notes No notes- no study No study- no good grades No good grades- no diploma No diploma- no job No job- no money No money- no food No food- really skinny Really skinny- ugly Ugly- no wife No wife- no kids No kids- lonely Lonely- death No pen=death

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What is green and has 4 wheels?... Grass, I lied about the wheels

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why did'n the baby wake up from his nap? because he was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q: A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? A:They both take turns, because they are driving across the country and it would be hard for one of them to drive the entire way.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A man walks into a bar gets hurt and falls over

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you call a deer with one eye? Injured.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why couldn't the blonde write the number eleven? She was paralyzed.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops