What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Godzilla steps on a bar and orders a Scotch.

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How did the blonde die drinking milk? She was severely lactose intolerant.

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Why did the child with one arm shave his head? He is a swimmer.

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Knock knock Whos there An axe murderer oh sweet come on in.... dinners on the stove and i am here all alone

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Q: A woman is hit by a motorcycle. Whos fault was it the motorcyclist's or the woman's? A: It was the motorcyclist's fault. He shouldn't of been riding his mortorcycle in the kitchen while she was making my sandwich.

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whats the differnece between a bag of dead babies and a ferarri? nothing ill never have either

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Why did the guy hate the man that said,"I respect you?'' Because the man was Hitler.

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Eric went for a poo in the public toilets. After he finished, he realised that there was no toilet roll. So he had to just pull up his pants and put up with his sshitty arse for the rest of the day. Unfortunately, he was in a board meeting and when he went in he stank of shit and it was a very uncomfortable feeling.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was stapeled on to the elephant.

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Women's Soccer.

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What do you get when you cross a celebrity with drugs? A highly probable circumstance.

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There are 3 people in a car, shit, manners, and asshole. They are driving and shit falls out. They pull over and manners gets out to help shit. Then a cop comes and pulls them over. The cop ask asshole what his name is. He said asshole. The cop said what. Then asshole said asshole. Then the cop says where are your manners. Asshole said over their picking up shit.

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roses are red violets are red everything is red who set my house on fire

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Why does the cow eat grass? A: Because it's green. (Cows are colorblind)

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Your're racist.

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What's the worst way to die? Alone.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? I left my car keys inside.

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Why did the little boy have gum on his shoe? Because he stepped on it

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Your mama is so ugly, when she looks in the mirror it displays her reflection like all mirrors do

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What did the chicken say after crossing the road? Nothing.It's a f*cking chicken.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to severely injure a human.

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To tell the truth... Your really an abortion that grew

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Why did Timmy fall off his swing? The Holocaust

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops