Why did Bob get off the swing? Because he was done.

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A coach walks into the team dressing room at halftime; his team is down 42-0. He screams at the players, "You guys are playing like a bunch of grannies. No offense"

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What's brown and sticky? Some brown pigment mixed with something sticky like glue.

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"Ask me a question." "No" "Cheese" ... "What?"

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How much do polar bears weigh? Between 800 and 1600 pounds

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Why didn't the kid get a bike for Christmas? Because his parents died and Santa's not real

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What's worse than rain on your birthday? Dying

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Hitler and Jews become friends.

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What do you get on anti-jokes.com? A bunch of repeated "jokes", that don't make any sense.

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whats the difference between a white jew and a black jew the black jew is treated poorly and is sent to the back of the gas chamber

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What goes up but never comes down? This dick

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Tommy got neutered.

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Knock knock *the family is on vacation and doesn't answer*

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knock knock who's there? The police your family is dead

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Why did the helicopter crash? Because the driver was fat.

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Q:why was steve sad? A:he had an extra penis

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how many Amish men does it take to change a lightbulb? Just one, but the likelihood of an Amish man needing to change a lightbulb is very slim.

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guess what the clown said to the kid... im a clown

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What did the Watermelon say to its baby? I'll SEED you later!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Jon "Bones" Jones will be fighting Rashad Evans for the Light Heavyweight title tonight at 10PM Eastern time at UFC145.

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Life is like a box of chocolates. Sometimes you get the shitty coconut ones.

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Little Stephanie was up all night on Christmas eve excited for her new bike that Santa was going to bring her. After tossing and turning for what seemed like decades, the sunset finally arose and Stephanie ran down the steps to unwrap her new bike with the family. Immediately after she went down the staircase, she found her parents marinated in their own blood, with knife wounds all around their body.

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How do you drown a dumb blonde? Hold her underwater.

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I remember this one time... I was sleeping... And all of a sudden... I woke up... Yeah.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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