What kind of animal eats and pisses on everything? Your mother. -Avery Vartanian

Knock knock Who's there? That that that. What makes you say that?

What did the little crippled boy get for his birthday? He's an orphan so he doesn't know his birthday.

Why do Jewish people like money so much? Because they can exchange it for goods and services

What has four wheels and can fly? A flying car What else has four wheels and can fly? Another flying car

Why can't Michael Jackson drive? Because he's dead.

Q:How many doorknobs should you throw at a police man? A:None you should have upmost respect for the law.

What did St. Mary Magdalene tell Pontius Pilate during the crucifixion of Christ? All this chaos is making me CROSS-eyed!

What do you call a black man on the side of the road? -A black man who needs a ride.

Knock Knock Who's there? Father Dougal Mcguire

Why did the little girl fall off the swing set? She had no arms.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

What's worse than being gay? Dying in a gas chamber in the Holocaust.

Obama 2012

Swag.

Why did the one pound coin cross the road? It was stuck up the chickens ass

What did the deaf Jewish Rabbi say to the Italian Priest. What?

Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he wanted to get to the other side.

A blind man walks into a bar and a table and a lady....

Knock knock! Whos there? Me. Now open the door.

What is the difference between a dead baby and a bowling ball? You can't pick up a bowling ball with a pitchfork.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing.

What is worse then rain on your wedding day? Getting married.

What goes in long and hard and comes out wet and sticky? A penis after orgasmic intercourse.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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