What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas A bike.

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Why was it okay for the people in the hospital to laugh at the narcoleptic patient? It wasn't. The patients were treated because of moral obligations, but the doctors that laughed were either fired or warned, depending on if they had previous reports of exploitation of patients.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None. It is an avian species incapable of throwing such a heavy material as wood.

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His face was drawn, but the curtains were real.

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what do you call a young man? a little boy

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What did the blind boy get for one of his Christmas present? A cinema ticket.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It is theoretically impossible to read another's inner thought process, but it was probably due to the electric stimulation from the brain to give the chicken's muscles the ability to move.

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Your mother is so poor she doesn't have any money!

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An American and Russian are arguing about their country. The American says "I can do things you can't. I can walk into the White House and into the Oval Office. I can bang my hands on my President's desk and say "Mr. Obama, I don't like the way you're running your country." The Russian says, "I can do that." The American says, "No, you can't." The Russian says, "Sure I can. I can go to Vladimir Putin's office and say "Mr. President, I don't like the way Mr. Obama's running his country."

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What do a worm and a human have in common? They both have arms and legs apart from the worm

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Why do black people like fried chicken? Well you see....

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Its not a big mistake at all, if people do not want to get hypnotized you cant hypnotize them, or so I thought...

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Why did the chick cross the road? Because she's a gold digger homie, dat chick is greedy like a mofo. She be all up in your grill and sheit tryin' getchu to spend your money lik dat homie ditch dat hoe, she aint even worth it brotha.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Suzie.

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poop

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whoes considered the best trackstar in the world. the random jamacan who ran onto the field.

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What do you do when you do what the do is the do for the do to do what you're doing that's done for what she did if you didn't do what not to do? ^error

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Why did the guy have one shoe? Because he took one shoe off at a time

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What starts with "P" and ends with "orn"? Popcorn

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Why was King Triton mad at Ariel? Her grades were under the C.

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What is yellow and white and goes 150 miles down a railroad track? a duck.

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How do you tell if a politician is lying? You make him take a polygraph test.

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What is white and smells like wood? White painted wood

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What's worse than finding a worm in an apple? When a child gets raped every night by its father.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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