Why was the man in the kitchen? Because his wife was raped and killed.

Why was the baseball player happy? He got married.

As I was riding my bike down the road, I saw a young boy being raped in a dark alley way. I proceeded to pedal and acted like i had seen nothing.

- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

what do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? a stick

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody because a pineapple is not a proper home

What did the bartender say to the black guy? hi there

Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

Knock knock. Who's there- oh wait, I don't care. Get away from my house or I am going to call the police.

Two men walk in to a bar. The first man says "I'll have some H20" The second man says "I'll have some H20, too." They both received glasses of water.

You know what they say about fat thumbs? They give a lot of accidental comment likes on statuses.

Why does Chuck Norris own a can named Chuck Norris? because he is self-centered due to all the attention payed to him for virtually no reason at all.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was stapled to a deer

Why didn't the boy cross the street? He didn't have legs

What do you call a chicken with no feathers, no guts, and no head? Fried chicken

Tilt your screen back

Three men went out for a night on the town, one had too much to drink and was forced to take a cab home.

What do you call an asian pilot? A pilot you racist bastard

Why did the woman go to the kitchen? The same reason she went to the bathroom, she needed to wash her hands because she was finger painting. Her husband was using the bathroom.

My girlfriend wanted to talk about her feelings ... SO I TOLD THAT BITCH THAT... i really loved her and care about her feelings

A muslim paints Mohammed

So a man walks into a bar... ouch

HOW LONG is a Chinese name?

Yo' mom is so fat, She should probably consider a low fat diet in which no more than 30% of the calories are from fat.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...