Why did the butcher have blood on his hands? He murdered his daughter.

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Why did the man commit suicide? Because all meaning in his life were gone.

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womans having rights.

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What did one prostitute say to the other prostitute? I'm dying of AIDS

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I like my women like I like my pancakes: Flipped over, inanimate, motionless, and covered in my syrup.

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nothing drews nose is f**ing hilarious

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how do you make a plumber sad? tell him to pull up his pants

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Spot the mistake: a) x+2= 5 => x=3. b You.

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Mr. Krabs lives in bikini bottom (pinch pinch)

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What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

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Q. What is the difference between Jesus and and a picture of Jesus? A. It takes one nail to hang the picture Not trying to offend anyone just a joke to be clear

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Once there was this duck. he was the best dentist in the world...

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Why didnt Jimmy go to school on Thursday? Jimmy is a vegetarian!

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Roses are red, violets are blue, Gee, I wish I could partake in even the first two lines of this stanza, but alas, I have colourblindness.

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What did Timmy say when the bus crashed? Nothing, it was a horrible crash, he died like everyone else. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Timmy.

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why did the car drive off the cliff? The driver was a potato...

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What did the sheep say to the Commonwealth Committee on September 11 2001? Baabaaabaaaahhh

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Knock Knock. Who's there? A Jehovah's witness.

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Yo' Momma is so fat she weighs a lot!

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Knock Knock whose there brian Brian who oh because im chinese you assume my second name is Hu? terribly sorry theres been a misunderstanding, i was asking you surname, i should have been more specific! No it my fault, i dont know why i overreacted my second name is Hu its ok, what can i do for you? is it allright to come in for some noodles? are you paying? only a reasonable price ok then, dont see why not

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When you give your homecoming date flowers, you're really handing them a bouquet of sex organs

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How many Dead Babies does it take fill a phone booth? There is an obvious epidemic going around causing millions of babies to die. This is no laughing matter and the mothers of these babies are probably going through therapy to get over their lost.

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What is white and can't climb trees? Powdered sugar.

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French man: Bonjour! English man: um, i am not french! french man: oh, My chat is on this beautiful country! Her name is Valentina! English man: What you poo in the open and name them?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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