What is the hardest thing about eating a vegetable? the wheelchair

What do you call a rollercoaster without a coaster? A roller

A: I slept in your mums bed last night. B: don't care dad

Then I contracted bronchitis from the smoke. Unfortunately I don't not have time to visit a doctor to mend this debilitation. In fact, nobody does.

How long does it take to acheive a superbowl win? However long it takes you.

A black man walks into an all white bar. He was escorted out, ten months later he died of a heart attack

How do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The refrigerator is lying on its side and the door is ripped off. The food is all over the place and the shelves are scattered around the floor. Your house will have suffered severe structural damage that insurance plan might not cover. Also there is a mortified elephant in you kitchen.

Knock Knock Who's there? F F who? F you.

hey i just met you and this is crazy so heres my number actually is dolan

What would Ronald Reagan say if he was alive today? Nice to meet you my name is Ronald Reagan

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They took away her Gameboy.

Why did the kid get hit by the bus? He was in the road.

How many British people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Two. One to screw in the lightbulb, and one to hold the flashlight because the room is probably dark.

periods are red waffles are blue your mum's a milf I sucked her boob

Do you know what's funnier than 24? 25

Blonde: what does IDK stand for? Brunett: i don't know Blonde: NOBODY KNOWS!!!

Micael Jackson enters a bar. Everyone screams, and then someone runs over and pulls the cheap mask off the impersonator's face. Michael Jackson IS DEAD, get over it

whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? a pizza does not have a heart

Why did the Chicken cross the road? The light was red, which prompted the chicken to cross safely.

If you rewind Gozilla, it's about a giant lizard that helps rebuild a burnig city, and then goes back into the ocean again...

if life gives you lemons, you have some lemons

What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

Why was the black guy so good at basketball? Because he practiced.

What did King Tut say when he got scared? How would I know? It was over a thousand years ago.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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