why did the boy have no friends? cause he was smelly

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What do you call someone with no arms, one leg,and an eye patch? names

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Why didn't the little boy hear the ice cream truck? He was deaf.

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Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? Cus he was dead. Why'd the other monkey fall out of the tree? Cus he was stapled to the dead monkey!

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What's pink and when you press a button it turns red? A baby in a blender. What's pink and when you hit it against the wall sounds metallic? A baby with two forks stuck in its eyes.

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I scream. You scream. We all scream. Because there is a rapist in the room.

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Men

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie-roll center of a tootsie-pop? zero if you bite it

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasnt due to the fact that numbers have no feeling.

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What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? Everything.

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Knock knock Who's there? A fireman. You're house burned down.

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https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCM8MQg1bn9y38H8Irhuxx-g

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Q: What's worse than school? A:Your mum dying

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Q) What did the Hobo get for Xmas? A) Nothing

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I can't submit this joke because I got the captcha wrong

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what happened when Bob told a joke? Joe laughed.

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i was in bed with a girl recently and she said to me 'I want tonight to be magical', so afterwards i disappeared.

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Two guys walk into a bar. Whoops did I say bar? I meant Hiroshima 1945. They got radiation poisoning and died slow painful deaths.

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How many Black People does it take to change a lightbulb? One. Changing a lightbulb is a very simple task.

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My granddad fell down the stairs the other day... Yeh, we didn't find it very funny either.

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Hats better than a stick? A stone

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Why couldn't little Tiffany play kickball with the rest of the kids during recess? Tiffany is a pencil.

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Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

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where do you find a dog with no legs? Korea. It's customary for the guests to get the drumsticks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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