- Anti Joke

Girl look at that body, girl look at that body, I got passion in my pants... Actually I lied, I got a penis and testicles in my pants, but I'm afraid to show it because people might think it's small, sorry

what's the difference between a crocodile?

Did you hear about my new Muslim friend? Hes the bomb!

Two monkeys are lying in a tree. Big monkey and little monkey, little monkey bites the big monkey's tale, big monkey starts jumping around the place shouting. Little monkey just starts laughing and takes another sip of whiskey.

What did the little boy say when he was asked what he wanted to be when he grew up? Adolf Hitler

I would, but I see an older version of the kid, that suffered so much pain and agony.

What is an emulation? I am not as stupid as I seem by the way, I am just a bit shaky myself, but don't you worry i will answer whatever you need,

How do you make a clown stop smiling? Hit him in the face with an axe.

That's about as suspicious as a nun doing squats in a cucumber field.

When the boy cried wolf who heard him? Not Helen Keller

What was Joe's old name? Joe, I lied about the old part.

What did the little boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer What did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that far

A man walks into a Norfolk pub. The landlord (not being very worldly) notices he is of Middle Eastern descent and asks "are you Bin Laden"? To this the man replies "No I bin Swaffham". (Needs to be said in Norfolk accent)

Why did Jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms. Knock-knock Who's there? Not Jimmy

Where do you find a vegetable? Where you left him

What's worst then finding an worm in your apple. Finding a colony of flesh eating bugs after you toke a bite.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What's worse then having your wife leaving you? Taking the kids with her.

what did the British horse say to the man who owned him? nothing all he sad was neigh.

Is your Alzheimers getting better? I have alzeimers?...

charlie sheen

Roses are red violets are blue I suck at poetry show me your tits!!

What's worse than a black guy? Two black guys....and a dead white man.

How many ADD kids does it take to screw...

Michael Jackson will always be remembered for touching...the hearts of many.