selena gomez & justin beiber go in space. selena says im hotter than the sun. the way she knows this information is that she is near the sun at this time justin beiber has already drifted off in space.

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Where did Susie go during the explosion? On her knees to catch it.

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What do you call a mexican man working at a Taco Bell? A young man freshly out of high-school, who could not get into college because his family is sadly struck with poverty. He also has a baby on the way, due to his poor choice of not using protection when having relations with his girlfriend while he was intoxicated. I wish him the best of luck!

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Whats worse being raped by jack the ripper or being fingered by captain hook

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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Q: What did the tree say as he fell? A: Studies have shown plants in general do not have a voice box, thus making plants incapable of speaking.

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John: hey wats up? Bob: gas prices!

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What did the fat kid eat for dinner? Salad, he's on a diet.

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Yo mamma is so fat She has to wear big pants and is easily fatigued.

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Why couldn't the Asian man drive very well? He was blind from birth.

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Q : How many babies do you need to paint a wall A : It depends on how hard you throw

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Why did the the chicken cross the road? So he wouldn't be late for his annual check up at the clinic across the street.

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Liar liar, your dead nans carcass is on fire.

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John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

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What did the man get on his birthday the week before he died? Obamacare

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What's the difference between a chair and an identical chair? Nothing.

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Snapple Fact #1 -slaves made life easier

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Know whats worse than a worm in your apple? Getting fridges thrown at you.

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What's the difference between a baby and an onion? One is a vegetable and the other is a human being.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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What's a dead baby look like? I don't know, I don't fap with my eyes open.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? a fish:)

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So three hikers decide to face the deadly challenge of climbing Mount Everest. They were unaware of the risks, and were all brutally killed in an avalanche.

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Whats Better Than an Anti Joke? sex...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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