Where do you find a dog with no legs ? Same place you left it ...

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Why did the fireman die? For various reasons,one was because he was burnt alive.

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Knock Knock ... Knock Knock The man proceeds to leave.

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A Russian drinking something other than vodka.

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Matrix if it had been with (as planned at some stage) with Will Smith. Normal Neo: Yes trinity lets find the others. Smith Neo: Yo pretty lady, lets go find them ho`s and chicken and stuff, then we can like go surfin and driving nuts and all that crackin stuff and then we etc etc. Normal Neo:... Smith Neo: You tellin ME this is your world Smith? Im Anderson yo and the one, Im gonna bitchmack you all and then just whoop you all with my master blaster no kidding buddy I have yellow belt Kung fu yo! Neo: We have to do something. Smith Neo; Yo unless we make a real rap video first we cant do the proper stuff you, why is this place all so green, get some colaaas! Seriously first we get carlton and then he dances his crazy dance while I go boyAAAAAAAAAAAAAAZ with my rap ok?

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What did the boy find I'n his water? Ice

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what starts with F and ends with ead? Fred was walking to school one day when he heard a strange noise in a tree. He walked up to the tree, looked up, and saw a cat. Fred was late for class, so he decided to go to school and help the cat out after school. Eight hours later, Fred came up to the tree and looked up to see if the cat was there. It wasn't. The cat was lying next to the tree, dead.

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Why do Christian protest against gay marriage? They protest because they believe gay marriage is a sin.

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Knock knock. Knock knock. Knock knock. I'm hammering nails. Knock knock.

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A cat starts grooming itself How many sprinkles does it take to cover the moon Cabinet because whales live in water

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Why is this joke an anti joke? Because it's not trying to be funny.

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I was just entering the toilet in a transport cafe just as a lorry driver was coming out. "I wouldn't go in there mate if I was you" he said "Why does it smell?" I enquired "No I've just murdered a prostitute"

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A horse walks into a bar. "Rough day?" says the bartender. UUUNNNHHHHH!

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Three blonds walk into a bar ... They said ouch!

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Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No Neither has Stevie

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Q: What used to be black, and then became white, and touches young boys? A: Michael Jackson.

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3 blind mice walk into a bar. they have no idea of their surroundings and are quickly crushed to death.

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If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring? -Allergies.

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Why did the police officer pull over the black person? He made a traffic infraction.

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why did susie fall off the dollar coaster? it only cost 50 cents susie is gone now

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Why do Jews fast for Yom Kippur? It's part of their tradition.

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VaginaBoob ^.^

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I scream You scream The police come It's awkward.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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