/\ The joke above was really dumb. \/ The joke below is pretty good.

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why did john wear a red hat? because blue is his favorite color

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"Your invited!" "Invited to what?" "I can't tell but everybody you know." " He he."

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Why was Tommy late for school? He got raped by spiderman.

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A man arrives at his work late, his boss says "why are you late?" Then man replys "...................." he was dead.

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A terminte walks into a pub and ask is the bar tender here?

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What did the little boy with cancer ask for from the Make a Wish foundation. A cure and to lose his virginity before he dies.

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Why couldn't the man open his car door for the women? He drove a jeep with removable doors

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how do you punish helen keller? leave the plunger in the toilet.

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What do anti-jokes and a can of corn have in common? Both can be stored indefinitely and accessed and enjoyed at will.

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How do you make Lady Gaga sad? You kill her family.

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Why did the little girl not speak? It was Anne Frank

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead. why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? because it was stapled to the first monkey? why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure.

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a dyslexic made a dessert. it was a bit dry.

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whats worse than the holacost? your mom giving you cubes in your drink when you requested crushed instead

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Did the single mother survive the plane crash? No.

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Why can't Emily swing because she has no arms Knock Knock Who's there Not Emily

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Q: What did the kid with no arms get for christmas? A: A set of Legos

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This is a poem about Red rosses and blue violets

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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What's worse than a pile of dead babies? The one at the bottom is dead. What's worse that that? It's eating it's way out. What's worse than that? It made it. What's worse than that? It went back in for 2nd's.

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Roses are blue Violets are buckets this poem makes no sense Washing machines

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What's Mackaulay Culkin's favorite salad dressing? Neverland Ranch.

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why was the movie rated PG 13? mild violence and sexual content

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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