Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

Roses are red Violets are blue Poetry is hard And so is wood

knock knock ? Who's there ? idunnop idunnop who ? Eww you've done a what?!

The Female Orgasm

Q:how do you make a rockstar cry? A: hit him with a breifcase

Why did the chicken cross the road? It's really irrelevant when you realize this joke is about a suicidal chicken...

im a policeman the car infront of me had a foot hanging out of the trunk. i pulled him over. i closed the trunk and proceeded to inform him of the dangers of open trunks.

Why did the little girl lose her necklace? Because she got her head blown off

A man had come into a bar. No wait, it was a horse. A man had come into a horse.

knock knock! whos there? me! me who? thats right! whats right? meehoo! thats what i want to know! whats what you want to know? me who? yes, exactly! exactly what? yes, i have an exactlywatt on a chain! exactly what on a chain? yes! yes what? no, exactlywatt! thats what i want to know! i told you--exactlywatt! exactly what? yes! yes what? yes, its with me! whats with you? exactlywatt--thats whats with me! me who? yes! Go away! knock knock.....

oh, brown loaf is fine, i'm on my bike.

Q: What's worse than finding a hundred dead babies, in one bin? A: Finding one dead baby, in a hundred bins.

"Knock knock." "Come in."

why did the asian man get straight A's? because he worked hard and studied everyday

How do you pacify Hitler? Give him jews.

What do you call a bird that can't fly? A dead bird

why did John fall off his bike I don't know I was not there it was a rumor at school

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a pack of wolverines and decided the best idea was to run away, and this decision just happened to involve him crossing a road.

A man asks a young boy to get in his van. The kid, being very well-educated tells the man he cannot talk to strangers. So, the man tells the kid he understands, and drives away to another nearby child.

Why did Kelly lose all interest in men? An aneurysm in her brain popped

Hello.

What did the Police Officer do after he made a positive identification of a Prostitute? He proceeded to pay her in cash for sexual favors because prostitution is legal in the state of Nevada

What is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into your grandmother and finding a fish

-Knock, knock! -Who is it? -Me

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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