How many ADD kids dose it take to screw in a light bulb? one; the attention deficit disorder dose not take away the ability too screw in a light bulb.

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Q: A vandal walked into a bar. What did the bartender say? A: Nothing, the vandal had covered him and the bar in pritt stick before he had the opportunity to speak, then left with his penguin accomplice, Reginald the third.

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How Many Women Does It Take To Parallel Park A Car ? Zero , The Husband Drove

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What is worse than the holocaust? A worm in your apple.

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Two tomatoes where crossing the road, when one of them barely avoided being run over. The other said, come on tomato!

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Q: What did the homeless man say when he was mauled by a bear? A: Ouch.

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good looking women

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Little Stephanie was up all night on Christmas eve excited for her new bike that Santa was going to bring her. After tossing and turning for what seemed like decades, the sunset finally arose and Stephanie ran down the steps to unwrap her new bike with the family. Immediately after she went down the staircase, she found her parents marinated in their own blood, with knife wounds all around their body.

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New groundbreaking research has just revealed today that a complex sentence can be used to manipulate the human mind, so in this sentence somewhere is a psychological amemphism that subconsciously hypnotises the mind into doing something within the next five seconds, and if you read this sentence over and over again, you might just spot it!

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A man walks into a bar and says to the bartender "Hey, 2 beers please" The bartender asks why he is ordering two, as he is alone. The man replies "There is a taxi waiting for me outside."

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How do you drown a dumb blonde? Hold her underwater.

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What has two legs and bleeds between them? The back half of a dog with a deep cut in its belly.

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i am a dino. RAWR.

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There are two eggs sitting in a carton in the refrigerator. The first egg says, "Sure is cold in here, eh?" The second egg replies, "Holy crap! A talking egg!"

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Why do mexicans like tacos? Because tacos are a very well liked food and they happen to taste good

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I forgot.

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Why was Martha put in a wheelchair? She was hit by a rabid cabbage.

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What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow.

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How do you milk a cow? Pull on its' utters.

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the firefighter says to the other firefighter: hey firefighter, are we going to fight a fire?

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A black guy and a hispanic guy walk into a bar they sit down and happily have a drink CHEESE ON TOAST

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Two monkeys are sitting in a tree. One monkey looks to the other monkey and says, "I bet I can jump from this tree to the next tree without falling." The other monkey replies, "I'm sure you could. You're a monkey."

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How do you throw a party in space? You planet!

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"I know it. I can feel it in my nuggets." -Chicken Joe

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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