Q: IMAGINE that your in a heart racing battle with a huge grizzly bear when suddenly a bird picks you up and carries you to china and leaves you on the adge of a cliff which then you are chased by warriors and are forced to jump off the edge. What do you do? A: Wake up

thumb_up thumb_down +30

How did th-A fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Fun fact: Steel wool comes from the fleeces of iron sheep.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Q: What do dogs and wind have in common? A: They're both blue. Except the dog. Or the wind. Wind is colorless.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

How many blacks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None we have mexicans for that

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What's the best way to win a race? Run faster than all other participants.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

why was 6 afraid of 7 because 6 just found out 7 had genital herpes.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding worms in your stool.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Knock Knock. Who's there? Dementia.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Two cats are sat on a window ledge. One cat looks to the other and says "Meoww".

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What did the homeless guy get for Christmas? Nothing, he's homeless.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

"It smells like Up dog in here." "How do you know what the dog from the movie "Up" smells like? It's computer-animated and not real." "I...I think I have a brain tumor..."

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Q-What was Hitlers favorite hobby to proceed in when he was sad? A- Manipulating populations and raping,torturing and mutilating the Jewish population.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did Romney loose the election? Because Obama had more votes

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did the boy get hit by a wrecking ball? Because he picked up an upside down penny.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

guess wat chicken butt guess why chicken thy guess who chicken poo guess how he chickened out

thumb_up thumb_down +28

I Have A Dog Named Woof Woof A Chicken Called Clucky A Cow Named Moo And A Pig Named Oink Lol Jks I Was Talking About My Wife

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Your mom is so fat, she had liposuction.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Q: What's grey and rocky? A: A grey rocking hair

thumb_up thumb_down +28

kennah campion... being nice

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What's harder than winning an argument with a woman. Lonsdaleite which has recently been declared the hardest substance known to man, and can withstand 58% more stress than the hardest diamond crystal.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Liar liar, your dead nans carcass is on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What do you say when someone attempts to steal your cheese? Give me my cheese!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops