See what I did here? ;) Ladies, I just need some space okay? Damn Space Invaders... Ijustmetthespaceinvaderstheytookmyspace << DOUBLE MEANING!

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I was going to write a joke about Alzheimers ... but I completely forgot it.

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Q:Why did the boy have no friends A: because Ants are not considered friends

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his farmer was abusive.

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How do you know a black man's been in your backyard? If you throw a barbecue and your friends of African-American descent decide to bring cold cuts.

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-What did the policeman say to the boy? -Hello.

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Why did a little kid have a long face Because his face was stretched out by a truck wheel

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-I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service

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How do I make my penis 12 inches? Tug on it.

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why was the little boy sad? because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Why did the man Jump of a bridge? Because he got sick of his life and he wanted to die.

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Why was the frog sad? Because he had a boy's face stapled to his feet.

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What did the elephant say to the whale? Nothing, neither can talk and they live in very different biomes.

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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What is worse than the holocaust Nothing it was fine with the Jews in camps burning and dying

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If you're paddling upstream in a canoe and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes fit in a doghouse? None! Ice cream doesn't have bones!

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Why did the man eat a human heart? Because he was part of a dangerous, religious cult.

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Why are there no casinos in Africa? Because of the exceptionally high poverty rate.

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What's ugly and has shit smeared over its teeth? Smelly McD (He also wears bin bag clothes)

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How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one.

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How do you get to the store, if your car is broken down? Steal a blind girls bike, she can't ride it anyway!

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What's orange, looks like and orange, probably tastes like an orange, and has no brain? Donald Trump

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

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The adventures of HAROLD THE MONGOOSE: Harry dug a hole. He did not like that hole so he dug a new one. He liked that hole so he did not dig another one. Harry slept on a rock. He did not like that rock. So he smashed it with a ham. Harry found a new rock. He liked that rock so he didn't smash it with a ham. Harry ate a snake. He did not like that snake so he regurgitated it. Harry ate another snake. He liked that snake so he did not regurgitate it. Harry encountered a bush. He did not like that bush. Unfourtianately for Harry, that Bush became president.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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