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What is the biggest lie that's still close to the truth? You came out of your momma's asshole.

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What did the old lady call the black pilot who's name was Marcus? Marcus

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one day a hippy and a nun wer on a bus, the hippy asks, Will you have sex with me? the none replies, heck no im a nun. the nun gets off the bus and the hippy follows. the bus driver stops him and says, i know how you can have sex with her, she goes to the cemitary at 9:00 every night, dress us as jesus and command her to have sex with you. okay thanks! the hippy says. that night the hippy dress's up as jesus finds the nun and says " i am jesus and i command you to have sex with me. The nun says okay but only A n a l because im a nun! and they get to it, when there done the hippy takes off his mask and says haha im the hippy, the nun takes off her mask and says haha im the bus driver!! like if you get it :)

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Why did the blind man walk into a shop He didin't walked into a wall

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how many niggaz dose it take to fit in al lightbolb?? 36 ahahahh yall deez nutz

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What do you call a deer with no legs? Legs in the City

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roses are red violets are blue i have Downs Syndrome... and a ding-dong potato

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Somebody else besides you: what time is it? You: what time is what? SOmebody else: ? What?

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A man with his masters degree, has a great job, and gets good money. Has a wife and kids. He is very successful.

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How do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The refrigerator is lying on its side and the door is ripped off. The food is all over the place and the shelves are scattered around the floor. Your house will have suffered severe structural damage that insurance plan might not cover. Also there is a mortified elephant in you kitchen.

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which is faster a) ferrari b) beetle a ferrari

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Did you know diarrhoea is genetic? It is a side effect of Polycystic Kidney Disease.

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What did I wake upto this morning that was white , cold and 2 inches deep? My tiny flaccid penis.

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Why did Betty fall out of the tree? Because she was dead! ????

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a horse walks into the bar. the bartender asks why the long face.

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Roses are Red Violets are Purple But nothing rhymes with purple.

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why did the Mexican fall and not the black man. i don't know, go ask the Asian.

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What's black, white and red all over? A dead panda

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An man walks into a bar and then proceeds to purchase an alcoholic drink.

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Your mama's so stupid that i wouldn't be surprised if you were to tell me that she didn't graduate high school.

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What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

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Q.why did the monkey fall out the tree? A. it was dead Q. why did the second monkey fall out the tree? A. it was hanging onto the first one Q. why did the third monkey fall out the tree? A. peer pressure

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You read this in school as a crowd of kids stand behind you laughing at your screen

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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