What do you call an Arab flying a plane? A terrorist. What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot. What are you racist or something?

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How do you make an anti-joke? Like this....

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What does a penguin and a watermelon have in common? They all come from Earth.

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Whats the difference between a Philadelphia Flyers fan and a pedophile? What they are.

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Wanna hear something irrational? Pi

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What did Mars say to warn Prehistoric Earth before an asteroid hit it? Nothing, sound can't travel through space, it's a vacuum. The dinosaurs will be missed.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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How many lemurs does it take to paint a wall It depends on how hard you throw them Why did Jane fall off the swing She has no arms Why did Jack drop his ice cream cone He got hit by a bus Did you know that if you pretend to eat salt you can actualy taste it Do this in public. Why was 6 afraid of 7 Numbers can't think This is the original anti joke A man walked into a bar he is an alcoholic and is distroying his family. Fin a penny pick it up and all the day you will have good luck Until you get hit with a car door. A man is SCUBA diving when he is almost out of air so he takes one breath an holds it to the surface The trip is so long that his lungs explode do to a change in pressure so he died.

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What's the difference between your garage and mine? A pile of dead babies.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? a fish:)

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What is Helen Keller's favorite color? Velcro

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Q: What do sleeping pills and coffee have in common? A: Absolutely nothing

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This is no joke. Well, I did warn you.

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Why did Emily fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Emily.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The barman says "What is this? A joke?" They then proceed to rape the barman.

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What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handlebars...except for the duck

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What did the single woman get for Christmas? Raped.

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What's the difference between a poodle and a noodle? Scaboodle!

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roses are red violets are blue if u wanna fight call 111 ( we r in new zealand)

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Q: What happened to the man who died? A: Nothing, there is no afterlife.

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What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike!

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What did the girl call the boy? ugly. they hated eachother.

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"Look me in the eye" said Cyclops.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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