what did the bot get for his birthday? .. men!

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You always hear of the 9/11 stories where people who work in the World Trade Centers were late that day or home sick or whatever. My mom also worked there. It was a normal morning, got up to make us breakfast, got us to school on time, the whole bit. After having to do all that stuff, she actually got to work on time, and she died in the attack.

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What's short, green, and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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a little violence in a relationship doesn't hurt anybody

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A: "Knock knock." B: "Who's there?" A: "John Doe." B: "John Doe who?" A: "..."

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, Bushes are red, Oh shit, my garden is on fire

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How did the Black man die at the KFC? Someone killed him.

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What did the cow say to the horse? Mooo

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How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? -Fish

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see monkey do. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the second monkey.

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What are the two sexiest farm animals? Consider that we are humans we shouldn't find any sex appeal in animals but if i had to guess I would say Brown Chicka Brown Cow

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I was Born ready I was born naked.

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are you from hawaii? because your the only ten I see

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A blind man walks into a deaf woman. He tries to apologize but she can't hear him.

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What did the black man get for Christmas? A felony conviction.

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Why did the man slowly cross the road? He had a prosthetic leg.

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"hey woody can i ask you a question" "sure buzz" "why is it your name is woody but they use me as a vibrator"

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Why was the blonde fired from the M &M's factory? Her Masters degree in electrical engineering made her overqualified for the job she had.

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this is not a joke.

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Don't tell anyone, the Health Department is already on our backs.

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The 80's called. They need their couch back.

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What's worse than having no coffee at the office? Looking out the window on the 100th floor and seeing the cockpit of a Boeing 767.

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What did the three blind mice say to the priest? I'm blind :(

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why was the white girl not wanting to have a baby with her boyfriend he was black

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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