Roses are red Violets are blue Everyone on antijoke that steals what I write go to hell My toaster has down syndrom.

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What did the homeless guy say to the not-homeless guy? I'm homeless.

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a black man has a shotgun. having an IQ of 11 he shot his hands off

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What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you? You die.

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why wasnt the baby cute? -because it was dead

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How do you get Vladamir Putin to smile? You tickle him.

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Why was the guy stupid? 'Cause he was!

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whats the king of the forest, is the color brown and is red all over? A deer or someone's soon to be dinner.

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Why can't Sally use the swings? Because she has no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there?? ... Not Sally.

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What did the white guy say to the two black guys? I like oreos.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to hit with a sledgehammer and the other is a watermelon.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it died. Q: Why did the dog fall out of the tree? A: Because it was tied to the monkey.

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Sally went to an R-Kelly concert what happend when she came out? No one because R-Kelly peed on sally and cops came in.

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Listen, I cannot as much as I would like, to take the full responsibility for every decision my former followers might decide to make of their own, we are no religion nor do we follow any kind of doctrines, we encourage freedom but also respect for our fellow human beings, all of them regardless of race or affiliation. But you let me know whoever has as much as looked at you the wrong way, and I will make sure they no longer find themselves welcome within my order, nor anywhere else if their actions merit the firm hands of justice.

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A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender says, "You know, you have a steering wheel down your pants?" The pirate says, "I know, I was just raped by a group of men who thought it would be funny to humiliate me as much as possible. The bartender then called 911 seeing that a horrible crime had just been committed.

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hey chris what yu doing wit my back pack? using it..

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Knock knock. Who's there? Auntie.

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whitney housten was supposed to sing at my funeral... but i dont think thats gonna happen. ;(

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What's cool about a dead fish? Nothing.

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What has two legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog.

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Whats funnier than a dead baby? a dead baby in a clown costume!!!

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why did the two girls fight? Because they were mad at eachother.

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Why did the homosexual cross the road without looking both ways? He was blind......

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Cool story bro. Tell it again.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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