Why can't Hellen Keller watch Spongebob? She doesn't have the proper cable service

If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him? Because that would be assault, and not only assault but aggravated assault, since you are using a weapon to do it. Plus, the lawyer would have an advantage over you in court during the trial, due to having a law degree.

Why did the man fall on the floor? He had a heart attack.

When Chuck Norris realized that there was a more superior being than himself. What did he say? Suck it Safka

If you were on an island with one wish what would you wish for? To get off the island

what did luke say to darth vader? Can i borrow ur car please.

What is worse than banging your knee on the coffee table? Tripping over one of the legs and smacking your head on the floor, causing a severe concussion.

What do you get when you cross a baby and a chainsaw? Life imprisonment.

a boy put a blanket oveer his head one night... He was warm for the rest of the night

why was 7 afraid of 6?that is impossible it is older than six and stronger than its mother

What is more addictive than World Of Warcraft? Heroin

Q. What did Michael Jackson say to the banana? A. Nothing, he's dead.

A tree falls in the woods. A deaf boy, who had been frolicking through the forest, is struck down by the tree. He dies. His parents are ridden with grief for years, until finally the father commits suicide. The mother soon remarried and had two more children. Both died before the age of 15. She was a horrible mother.

What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A Pilot.

What did I say to my mum this morning? Good morning.

Why did the chickens leave McDonalds? Because they refused to have their nuggets deep fried (Wyndellberg)

A man arrives at his work late, his boss says "why are you late?" Then man replys "...................." he was dead.

What's faster, a train or a bike? A horse because a cow gives milk

so i turned on my radio.. so i could like listen to some tunes but like, it wasnt working and then like my best bud leaf was all like dude, thats a toaster.

What's worse than an asian driver? A blindfolded asian driver.

whats the difference between a fat person and a skinny person ? there weight.

Whats funnier then a dead baby? A lot of things.

Why isnt there any mexicans on star trek? Because even in the future they dont work.

What's the Green Lantern's favorite holiday? Hannukah

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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